Survival Tip: Unspoken Rules of Drinking in Korea

You've moved to Seoul and, on top of living in a city you know little about, you live in an area that is the "bright lights, big city" equivalent of...

The only times you've been "out" have been with your coteachers/coworkers who, 9/10, will be speaking only Korean the entire time. If you speak Korean, good on you, this might actually be fun, but if you don't you'll just sit there, smiling dumbly, laughing only because other people are laughing, and all the while thinking...

But, come on, this is a HUGE city, there must be SOMETHING fun out there to do at night when getting your drink on is absolutely essential.

I'm here to tell you just how right you are...

However, there are some "unspoken" rules about partying in the Soul of Asia:

1) Soju is from both Heaven and Hell

Ohhh sweet, sweet soju. As I've described in previous posts: soju is cheap, available everywhere, and the perfect beverage to compliment one of the greatest foods in the world: Korean BBQ.

It's been one week (translation: it's been too long!)

When you're out on the town and have been hitting overpriced bars and even more overpriced clubs, soju seems like the perfect way to end a night. It stares at you from the refrigerator of the CU Mart or waits tantalizingly close to you at a restaurant. So cheap... so alcoholic...

It looks all...

When in reality, it's...

Soju, as a way to end a night, is an absolutely terrible idea. It's also a terrbile "middle of the night" choice. Pretty much it should only be consumed at the beginning of the night or with food. You see, soju, pre-drunk, tastes like a weak vodka. It's not the greatest drink in the world but, in the right context, is enjoyable. As the night goes on, however, and your taste buds become extra-dumb, the taste kinda goes away and you're just left with "awesome, this alcohol makes my alcohol more alcohol!" When consumed while already drunk it will flow like the substance it most closely resembles (aka water), and in the morning... well... lets just say few hangovers are more hangover-tastic than soju hangovers. Side effects will most likely include: incredible headache, the runs, inability to ingest anything other than ramen, and a stink that won't wear off for 24 hours no matter how hard you scrub.

Because we foreigners are not used to the effects of soju, a decent percentage of us have taught at least one class... well...

2. Beware of Anju

Alcohol in Korea is DAMN CHEAP. I mean, cheap as free. Less expensive than soda. Bars, to make up for the fact that selling booze makes them almost no money, will often not allow you to drink unless you order food. This type of food is called anju, the Korean version of bar food, and can run the full spectrum of what is served (anything from cheese ddokbokki to fruit platters). Also to help offset costs, the anju will frequently be FREAKING EXPENSIVE! This is because they fully expect you to want to get drunk and, as we all know, when you get drunk you make poor financial and diet decisions.

Did I say "poor diet decisions"? I meant "the most epically awesome diet decisions!!!"

The best way to avoid anju is to always avoid bars that kinda look like restaurants, or ones that don't look more like western bars. Western style bars are mostly found in Itaewon, Gangnam, or Hongdae, but even these areas are not anju-free. The absolute best anju-free bars, in my opinion, are "self-bars." 

*angels singing*

Now, please don't get confused, there is also an amazing chain of all-you-can-eat Korean BBQ buffets called "Self Bar," pretty much if you see BBQ grills when you go into a place marked "self bar" these are not the droids you are looking for. Look for a large wall of beer coolers that is out in the open, not behind a counter. Also, look for the word "셀프" on the signs outside. You just go to the fridges, grab your beer, consume it, and then take all the empties up to the counter at the end. You can also feel free to grab any snacks you see and pay for them at the end. This is an amazing way to avoid the overwhelming fear many Asian establishments have of splitting the bill.

3. Lock Up Your Stuff!

If you're the club-going kind and a night full of sweating, dancing, and permanent inner-ear damage sounds ideal to you, have no fear, Seoul has plenty of playgrounds for you to abuse. There's amazing clubs throughout the city, but that's for another post. Clubs in Korea, like clubs everywhere, can be either over-priced and swanky or cheap and full of creepers. The best thing about Korean clubs, however, is that almost all of them, rather than a coat-check, have lockers. You'll need 500 won coins to use these, so steal some from your Daiso piggy bank before heading out. No matter how jam-packed the club, you can normally find at least one locker vacant, so your arms will be free to...

Or, if you're planning more to club hop or bar hop and want to drop off your briefcase/backpack/small child, almost every subway station in Seoul has lockers available to rent. Even after the subway closes these lockers are still accessible. The drawback, however, is that many of these are now digital and without menus available in English, and, most of the time, you SHOULD NOT LEAVE YOUR THINGS IN THESE UNTIL THE NEXT MORNING. Take your stuff out before the subway opens again at 6am. 

4) Sharing is Caring

Koreans are a super friendly people. They are insanely giving to their friends and, once the alcohol starts flowing, become SUPER friendly to strangers. Chances are, if the table next to yours has someone who can speak even high-beginner English, you will make new friends when out at the bars and restaurants. Koreans love talking to each other and, with liquid courage, are anxious to practice their English and give foreigners a good image of Korea. I've had middle-aged groups of Koreans buy massive amounts of alcohol for me and my friends. These bottles will be brought to you by waiters or waitresses still sealed, so no need to worry about being drugged.

So when the table next to yours looks at you like...

WARNING: The people doing this will probably NOT be this young or attractive

Say anything in Korean to them... seriously... anything... even just "anyeonghaseyeo" (hello) and they'll be all...

Translation: WOWW!!!

And then they might order your table drinks until both of your tables are all...

The next kind of sharing is a little more... unorthodox. When you're in an area with a large crowd-density late at night, getting a cab can be a massive pain in the ass. The cab drivers are also well aware that you are leaving the party district because you are either a) super drunk b) super tired c) both. They know how desperate you are to go home and will try many things to get as much money as possible. This will include quoting you a price or inviting other people that you don't know to share the cab if you're going in the same direction. Both of these things are technically illegal, and, if you don't want to, you don't need to put up with it. If you express to them that you know that it's not legal or make clear that you won't accept it, they won't force the issue. However, sharing a cab, if you have a buddy with you, is not the worst thing that could happen to you, because it will help make the cab ride less costly!

So there you have it. Did I miss anything? Leave a message in the comments. Also, what do you think are the "unspoken rules" of getting drunk where you live?

Survival Tip: Korean Cosmetics

If you're like most girls you are FIERCELY brand-loyal about your cosmetics and the thought of having to find a new foundation after you've loved and trusted Maybelline's Super Stay foundation in Classic Ivory for YEARS it's just... it just makes you... NNNOOOOOO

But ladies, take a big, deep breath, and put on your big-girl panties, because here's the most amazing news about living in Korea:

Korean cosmetics are not only everywhere, but are vastly superior to American cosmetics!

You thought all Korean women were just naturally porcelain? Dude, gtfo.

Here are the lessons you need to learn about Korean Cosmetics:

#1 Cosmetic Stores

Ok, so this is strictly from an American perspective, but all my red, white, and blue bleeding ladies out there, what is the first thing that pops into your head when you see a stand-alone cosmetics shop?

I'm gonna buy my make-up at the grocery store, like any REAL person does!

Here's something you're gonna need to know: most grocery stores in Korea do NOT sell cosmetics. I'll give you a second to pull yourself back together after this news... No, you will not be able to go to the store just for mascara and Lean Pockets (you can't find those here either). Koreans buy all their make-up from stand-alone cosmetics shops and these stores are EVERYWHERE! If it's an even semi-busy pedestrian street there will probably be at least three cosmetics shops. 

You'll have to experiment to find out which ones are your favorite, but here's my break-down. I go to Face Shop for BB Cream, Eyeliner, and Bronzer; Holika Holika for Blush, Compact, and Eyebrow Pencil; Laneige for Eye Shadow; Etude House for Cleansers; and I still haven't found a lipstick here that I like, but I'm absurdly picky when it comes to lipstick, even though I never use it. Holika Holika just released a new BB Cream compact that I am becoming obsessed with for touch-ups during the day (they market it as the only foundation, powder, and compact you'll need, but I've found it doesn't feel nice as a base).

I know that the fact that I go to so many different stores for different products might sound like a hassel, but because cosmetics stores are so omni-present in Seoul it's really just a matter of seeing one of these stores when I'm out doing something else and thinking "oh yeah, I needed that thingie." 

The stores range from cheap (Etude House) and expensive (Laneige), but if you go to Myeongdong you can easily just wander around trying things from al of the different shops until you find what works best for you. Seriously, Myeongdong is mostly cosmetics stores and every major store has at least 2 if not 3 or 4 locations within the three-block radius of the Myeongdong Shopping Street. Myeongdong is also a very touristy area, so they'll frequently have sales that other branches of the store around the city wont have (like buy 2 get 1 free of BB Cream!!!).

For more recommendations I found an awesome blog post by The Wanderlust Project and I agree with/ am dying to try some of her recommendations.

#2 BB Cream

After moving here I waited as long as I possibly could before going out and testing Korean cosmetics. I even contemplated having my mom ship me my go-to foundation from America. I didn't know if Korean stores would have my color, the right products, or if I'd even understand how to use the products the had (the directions are written in Korean, after all). Finally one day I strapped on my adventure pants and went into the Face Shop in my neighborhood. Most Korean cosmetic names for products are in both Korean and English, so I easily found the foundations, but then I discovered that all of the foundation had this weird title of "BB Cream." WHAT THE HELL IS BB CREAM?!

The BB in BB Cream stands for "blemish balm." The product was originally developed in Korea to treat blemishes and sensitive skin after facial treatments. The major difference that I've found between BB Cream and foundation is that BB Cream is extremely lightweight, breathable, and provides medium coverage with the added benefit of spf 15+. I have a moderate amount of acne scaring and mild rosacea (curse my super-white skin!) and BB cream covers this up easily. BB Cream also has various other skin benefits. Though I stick with one that has long-lasting coverage, you can buy ones with whitening, higher spfs, anti-wrinkle, and anything else you can think of. 

Typically BB creams come in only 2-3 different shades, but the coverage is so light that as long as your skin is either Caucasian or Asian skin tones you should be fine. If you have darker skin you can find BB creams in your shades in larger tourist areas (like Myeongdong!) or most department stores will carry darker shades.

I now far prefer BB crea to foundation and have even converted some of my friends and relatives over to the ways of the BB cream. Seriously, this stuff is crazy good, stock up before moving back to your home country!

#3 Additional Stages

Koreans, for the most part. have amazing skin, and it's not all due to BB cream (though guys wearing BB cream is perfectly socially acceptable, if not encouraged). They are a lot more serious about skin care in general. The products that they use are numerous and have varying benefits. Before I allowed Mr. Y to hijack my skin care I would use moisturizer and, from time to time, a nuclear weapon of a spot treatment (aka pure tea tree oil). Now that he has taken it over my skin care consists of cleansing, eye-makeup remover, toner, spot treatment, eye cream, moisturizer, and another moisturizer. And that's light for a Korean!

Your most masculine of masculine Korean men wouldn't think of leaving the house without toner, moisturizer  and some kind of sunblock (warning to guys, most sunblocks have at least a little pigment added to them). Toners here go by a LOT of different names, and no matter how many times I have a Korean try to explain the differences to me I can't really see a point. There's toner, skin, and essence. And then there's serum! Here's a little timeline for the Korean skincare product usage order: cleanser, toner, skin (which is almost the same as toner, but sometimes has some moisturizing qualities), essence (which is getting closer to moisturizer), serum (getting warmer to moisturizer, but normally has a specific trouble it's trying to address, like anti-aging or whitening), moisturizer, and then a BB cream primer. Yeah... that's a lot.

However, committing to this skin-care regimen doesn't necessarily have to bankrupt you, as long as you're ok with not being extremely loyal to a brand or product. You can collect an massive amount of these products as free samples that you will get for either just walking into a cosmetics store or from buying other products. I've lost my make-up bag twice since moving to Korea (once on the subway and once in a hostel in Thailand) and just from replacing my makeup collection I have a shoe-box full of free samples.

#4 The World = Make-Up Studio

I have never seen a place more accepting of using every reflective surface as a mirror. There are mirrors everywhere! In elevators, on stairways, in classrooms, everywhere! Korean's are a little obsessed with looking perfect all the time. You will see, at least once a month, a woman get on the subway wearing no make-up, sit down, and apply ALL of her make-up. Not the simple "I don't have a lot of time to fuck around with colors" amount of make-up, the "momma's goanna get LAID TONIGHT" amount of make-up. Watching these free make-up tutorials is actually an easy way to learn how to use different Korean products. Free make-up lessons with your morning commute!

This also reveals another useful lesson about Seoul. The subway ride is so smooth here that women can apply liquid eyeliner while riding and not have it look like this:

Review: Hair + Joy

I am not normally one for being negative on the internet. I avoid troll-y posts and am very patience with the ignorance of others. However, certain injustices cannot go unnoticed, and one of these injustices is a terrible haircut from a salon with a decent online reputation:

I look like I should be wearing ripped and baggy faded jeans, no bra under a white t-shirt, and sipping a cappuccino while talking about which of my friends are a Monica, Rachel, or Phoebe!!!

Hair + Joy in Hongdae is supposed to be one of the few salons in Seoul that specializes in cutting Western hair. It’s pretty much the only salon in Seoul you can find English reviews for and most of these reviews are pretty positive. I think, however, that these few reviews have been the only ones on the internet for a good long time and that the place has fallen from it’s once decent position.

The hairstylist I had was fucking NOT inspired by what I wanted to have done (it’s VERY rare for any hairdresser to be uninspired or unexcited to dye a person’s hair vibrant red). I said I wanted it a bright red and was having trouble deciding between something more coppery or something more orange. I said I wanted something in-between and she gave me a very “I don’t have time for this shit, just pick one of the colors I can take from the box and lets move on” attitude.  I even brought up the possibility of doing mostly copper with highlights of the other shade and received nary a response. The color job she did was incredibly dull and matte, the complete opposite of what I asked for other than the fact that it is in the red hair spectrum.

The coloring was fine, the shampooing divine (I am of the firm belief that few things in life feel nicer than a good salon shampooing), but then come the cut. I had told her earlier that I wanted about an inch and a half trimmed off (and showed her what I meant for good measure). My hair when we began was, at it’s longest layer, about halfway down my back. I left with in only a few inches passed my shoulders, what I am now calling “lazy soccer-mom length.”  She then gave me bangs… fucking bangs,  not the sweeping “slightly shorter layers so my hair drags across my forehead” that I asked for… bangs. She then layered the fuck out of it to where it is too thin towards the ends rather than layering to just give it texture, like I asked for.

Then came the fucking styling. The first time I went to Hair + Joy the coloring was acceptable (I was going for something a bit darker at that point), the cut was minimal (I asked for lots of layers and she said “no, only 2 layers is better”), and the styling was half good and half “WHAT THE HELL, LADY?!” She had her male assistant curl the majority of it and he did a really nice job. However, she then made me wait half an hour while she finished with another customer before giving me these limp, shitty curls towards the front that did not blend with the assistant’s curling job at all.

This time was WAY worse. She blew-out the top layers and the bangs until it was a gross amount of volume, and then did her same half-assed loose curls that resulted in the ends of my hair sticking horizontally straight out. She also managed the situate the curls so they would move my hair in towards my neck giving me this gross 80’s hairmet (hair helmet) effect.  I immediately ran to the bathroom and put my hair up in a ponytail once I left.

Long story short (too late) do NOT waste your money at this place and the search for an acceptable Korean salon continues… SSSIIIIGGGHHHH!!!

It looked a bit better after I washed it and styles it myself, but I am still not terribly happy.

Things You Gotta Do: LotteWorld

Outside

AND inside, ohh boy!!!

Korea has pretty much two major theme parks: LotteWorld and Everland. Mr. Y and I had originally planned on going to Everland to celebrate Korean Independence Day but the weather was... uncooperative (code for "it was DAMN cold outside!"). So we cut our losses and chose to go to LotteWorld instead. Half of LotteWorld is inside and half is outside, which is perfect for Korea's bipolar March weather.

Our one mistake, however, was going on a holiday... just like everyone else in Seoul. Seriously, this place was MEGA crowded and the lines for rides were kind of out of hand. We waited for about an hour just to get into the place! Then it was a 45 minute wait to ride the bumper cars... the bumper cars, people! Yeah, bumper cars are the greatest carnival ride of all time, but come on LotteWorld, you gotta have a bigger space for them and more than 12 cars, it's called efficiency!

The best part of the day, however, came from what could have been our absolute biggest mistake. After trying to find a line that had a wait time of under an hour (long story short: didn't find one) and a really disappointing lunch (I had my first bad bibimbap... I could have cried) we chose to just suck it up and wait in a huuuuge line for Pharaoh's Fury. We were in that line for 2 hours!!! Thankfully our phone batteries were at full and I brought my Kindle (finished the second book of the Hunger Games), so the wait was less than painful. When we finally got to the head of the line... it broke down...

My exact reaction.

Now, what could have quickly devolved into...

Was expertly handled by the LotteWorld staff and instantly turned to...

They decided to give all the people who were waiting in the line for more than an hour MagicPasses. The LotteWorld MagicPass is... an elusive being. In order to obtain them you pretty much need to get to the park two hours before it opens, wait in line, and make a run for it to the rides that give MagicPasses in order to get one of these limited slices of heaven. Personally, I feel LotteWorld would do better to just offer an increased ticket price that allows you entrance to these rides only and has them on the MagicPass system, since these are the best rides in the park. Anyway, they came to Mr. Y and I and asked us how many. Being the sneaky snake that I am and given my love for taking advantage of massive corporations I quickly blurted out "4, two of our friends are in the bathroom!"

We hustled out of there and ran to the line for the French Revolution roller coaster  We decided to continue the deception and told the lady running the MagicPass line that I had lost my pass, and she let us in anyway! Mr. Y had warned me that he doesn't like thrill rides... my hand wishes I had listened. He wound up crushing my hand against the handlebar on his harness! Oh well, that's one thing where we differ. Oh well! This just meant that I was able to go on the Atlantis roller coaster with our spare pass! These were both very very good roller coasters and I highly recommend either nabbing a MagicPass for them or sucking it up and waiting in the insane line (both lines were 3 hours or more when we skipped them). With our last two passes we chose to ride the line that had given us such a wonderful gift: Pharaoh's Fury. Which... was AWFUL!!! Seriously, skip this ride, it's super outdated and terrible...

When all was said and done LotteWorld was a fun way to spend a day, if you're totally laid back and not impatient. If you're impatient I'd recommend finding a way to go on a school day, so there aren't as many families, teenagers, or college-aged kids (which was the vast majority of the people there).

Things You Gotta Do: MagicPass (if possible), get there early, eat junk food, buy cute animal ears, French Revolution, Atlantis

Things You Can Skip: Pharaoh's Fury, restaurants, any ride with a height restriction that is higher than your chest.

Things You Gotta Do: Seoul in the Winter

Before Christmas, nothing makes me happier than the onset of winter. My heart prepares to explode with so much Christmas Spirit that it can legitimately terrify those around me. I haven't lost the childlike wonder at Christmas lights; excitement for picking out, giving, and receiving presents; or the wide-eyed anticipation for the big day. Snow falling at Christmas time practically throws me into a Christmas Joy seizure.

I am 5 years old

But... after Christmas...

If it's not Christmas, and not snowing, I have no love or patience for winter.

It's still damn cold outside. Last week the temperature has had a random jump and it was 42F outside (8C) which made me all...

WHY MUST YOU TAUNT ME!?!?!

Seriously, this kind of random warm day fills one with hope for a warmer future. A future where I don't have to wear thermals, tights, another pair of leggings, and another pair of warmer thermals in order to survive both my commute to work and life in a Korean building in the winter (if you have no idea what I'm talking about, I suggest you take a look at my previous post). Spring in Korea is legitimately beautiful and joyous and makes winter almost worth all the strife. Almost...

Other than heinous temperatures and worse fashion choices, a lot of what is awesome about Korean life disappears in the winter.

No drinking in the park while looking fabulous...

Seriously, in how many countries can you drink in a public park and not feel like a homeless person?

Iced Americanos, Kimbap and MoolNaengMyun, while still delicious, are nowhere near as satisfying...

Buckwheat noodles in an iced broth, sooooo refreshing...

No ice cream treats to reward myself for a day well done; no sitting outside at cafes; no long walks through the city; no exploring palaces, neighborhoods, or temples; life is one endless...

SO DARK, SO COLD, MUST GET INSIDE!!!

So how exactly does one survive the horrible, soul-crushing depression that comes with this season of terribleness?  By partaking in one of the many winter activities that can help you fall back in love with this city and this country. I normally try to stay away from lists, but I really can't think of any better way to go about this...

The 5 Best Winter Activities in Seoul

1) EAT!

One of the blogs I follow religiously recently posted a very good list of the best Korean cold weather foods, and I couldn't agree with them more (check it out here). I freaking love Hotteok (호떡, basically a dense pancake with the syrup on the inside) after a day of running from store to store in one of the many shopping districts in Seoul it's a nice way to reward yourself for actually getting shit done rather than holing up in your apartment all day.

Also, if Korean food does one thing right it's soups. Almost every Korean soup will be served to you in a ceramic bowl that has been heated on the stove so the soup is still literally boiling when it reaches your table. Many Korean soups are pretty spicy as well, to make sure the heat you feel lasts an extremely long time. The Korean words for soup are 탕 (tang), 찌개 (jjeegae), and 국 (gook). I found a really nice overview of Korean soups here. My personal favorite soups are 떡만두국(ddeok mandu gook, rice cakes and dumplings in a chicken broth) and 뚝배기뿔고기 (ddook baegi bulgogi, shredded up beef in a sweet, oniony broth), but, rest assured, I've met few Korean soups I haven't liked.

2) Museums

Seoul, like any major international city, has a LOT of museums with many different things to offer. I feel that expats, as a community, miss out on museums and other "touristy" things because we like to think of ourselves as above tourists and are constantly telling ourselves "I'll go soon, not now." Before we know it it's our last month here and we're scrambling to see all of the things we had "so much time" to do!

If you are new to Korea and are wondering about Korean history and cuture I'd recommend the National Folk Museum. It's nicely laid-out and has a good selection of exhibits for someone new to Korean culture.

To delve a little deeper into Korean heritage I'd send you to the National Museum of Korea. This place is MASSIVE, it has 3 floors of permanent exhibits all with art and artifacts from Korean history. There's also a large building attached for travelling exhibits (the current one is of glassware from the Mediterranean and western Asia). My advice: don't try to do this museum all in one day! I'd suggest you pick one floor for your visit. I have only seen the third floor and would highly recommend it.

If modern warfare is more your style there's a very nice museum at the War Memorial of Korea. There's a really nice ancient warfare exhibit on the lower floors (don't miss the Turtle Boat and General Lee SunShin exhibit) and the exhibits about the Korean War are very informative. I do, however, think that the entire museum could do with a bit of a facelift.

If you're not looking for history and would prefer a bit of fun there's the Santorini Museum. The complex has a few museums attached but the part that draws the most visitors is the Trick Eye museum where you can pose and interact with various artworks. Visiting this place at least once is pretty much obligatory for any expat in Seoul (I've seen enough photos on Facebook of my friends with wings or coming out of a picture frame to last me the rest of my life), but it is, in fact, good, clean, warm fun.

For the art lovers there's the Seoul Museum of Art. It's known more for it's exhibitions than it's permanent collections, but the exhibitions are pretty damn cool (they currently have the travelling Tim Burton exhibit and a really interesting looking exhibit about Hangeul, the Korean alphabet). Personally, I really like the Leeum Art Museum. They have a very nice, very relaxing exhibit on Korean ceramics as well as a decent modern art museum and sculpture garden.

3) Specialty Rooms (-방, Bangs)

They range from karaoke, video games, board games, TVs, and... well, there's pretty much one for any activity you could do at home (including owning a cat or dog!), but don't feel like spending the money  for. For small activities, like PC and video games that are done with one or two people, these "rooms" will actually be more like computer or TV labs where you're in a big room with many other people (most of them teenage boys). If you have a larger party, however, you'll be given a room with couches and whatever other things you need and are then left up to your own devices. I've only ever been to a karaoke one (노래방 "noh-rae-bang"), which is a SUPER fun way to end a night of debauchery in Seoul. There's also multi-bangs where they'll have many many different activities set up in individual rooms. All of these places charge by the hour or half-hour. You can even find luxury style ones of all the -bang types where the equipment and rooms will be nicer and... cleaner. Ok, it's no mystery to those of us here, but many of these places are often used as a place for teenagers and 20-somethings who still live at home to hook-up. But hey! The lights are dim, so you won't be able to tell if you should be concerned for your personal hygiene...

4) Lotte World Indoor Amusement Park

I'm going to admit right away that this is the thing on this list I know the least about. Mr. Y and I are busy people and haven't yet found a day where we were completely free to enjoy LotteWorld. However, a lot of my friends have gone and enjoyed themselves, so here it is. The indoor area is pretty damn big and has pretty much everything. There are roller coasters, rides, games, and a massive indoor skating rink. Caribbean Island (the Everland water park) also has an indoor area, but it's not very big, so I wouldn't recommend making the trek (though they are working on a subway line for which Everland will be the last stop).

5) Korean Cafe's

Korea is obsessed with coffee and cafes, particularly with cafes. Even though Korean coffee is fraught with differences and occasionally peril, they do one thing VERY right and that's cafes. Korean cafes are everything a cafe should be. They're warm, cozy, quiet, extremely unique, and slightly overpriced (but, come on, you're paying for the ambiance!). Chances are that if you wander around any neighborhood in Seoul you'll find a cafe to fall in love with. Last year when the Kimchi Queen, C, and I all lived in Suyu-dong we would meet for coffee at least once, if not five times a week after school. We frequented (and I do mean FREQUENTED) four different cafes each with a completely different vibe and speciality (my favorite was the one with amazing muffins). So, take a chance, wander around, go into a random cafe, and enjoy.

My current favorites:
Coffee Haven: Wangsimni station exit 2, go straight, take the first street left, the sign is huge and hard to miss. They make great sandwiches and have the best caramel macchiato I've ever had.
Myeongdong Coffee: Myeongdong station, exit 6, walk down the insanely busy alley, take a left at the first big pedestrian intersection, take a left down the main pedestrian road, it has a black sign with white lettering, second floor. COOKIES FREE WITH COFFEE! Oh, and it's really cozy.
Soul Kitchen Cafe: Anam station, exit 2, pull a 180, take the first street right, it's on the left, big blue building. It's the best "get shit done" cafe I've found, ok coffee
Hackney Coffee: Noksapyeong Station, exit 2, walk straight along the brick wall, take the first street left, it's up the hill and on your right. AMAZING and relatively cheap sandwiches, very good coffee, cute barista.

There you have it, that's as much as I can think of. Other than these activities I suggest you figure out how to order in pizza and McDonald's, crank up the ondol, get a warm blanket (best place to buy blankets is Dongdaemun), and settle in, because it's going to be a looooooonnng winter.

Exploring Korea: Hwacheon Ice Festival

It's freaking cold and, in Seoul, the only thing to do outside when it's cold is go to an ice skating rink (of which there are many) or complain about how cold it is as you rush from indoor area to indoor area. We, my friends, are forced to look outward. Out of our lovely city cocoon to the great wilderness that is the rest of the country. To those who have only lived in Seoul their entire time in Korea and rarely ventured outside the city limits (that time you went to Gyeonggi-do doesn't count! It's the suburbs!) traveling around this wonderful, wild country can be rather daunting. Their hotel and pension websites don't have an English option! There's little to no English tourist information about less populated areas! 95% of the cars aren't taxis! Not everything has a taxi or bus to take you there and stuff isn't within walking distance! It's enough to make a person panic! To be sure, this is one of the top ten situations where Korean-speaking friends come in the MOST handy. Anyway, I'm getting away from the real topic here... The point is I wanted to get the crap out of Seoul and do something fun, and that led us to...

The Hwacheon Ice Festival

Smells Fishy!

Hwacheon is a district in the county of Gangwon to the northeast of Seoul. It has a lot of very beautiful rivers and gets damn cold in the winter, causing almost all of the rivers to freeze over. 

For reference

Every year they hold an ice festival that has every kind of ice activity you could imagine and some you would have never thought of (seriously... there was one are where people were kneeling on saucer sleds and pulling themselves along using two 7" dowels...). The more notable activities are ice fishing for Sancheonneo (Mountain Trout), barehand fishing, ice soccer, ice sledding, ice skating and many, many, many, more. Pretty much any verb you could imagine doing on ice it was there.

Ice... Ineffective Aerial Attempt? WHY THE HELL NOT?!

Myself, Mr. Y, and 10 of our good friends left Seoul Saturday afternoon for our pension rental. The pension was roughly a 15 minute drive from the Chuncheon ITX Rail Station and was about halfway between Chuncheon and Hwacheon. Our Pension owner was nice enough to pick us up from the station and then drive us to the festival the next morning. In order to get to Hwacheon from Seoul you can either take a direct bus from the NamSeoul Bus Terminal or take the ITX to Chuncheon and then take a 30 minute bus from there to Hwacheon. I recommend the latter because the ITX Chuncheon line is MUCH nicer than a bus. 

Just look at how wholesome and comfortable these handsome people appear!

Incase I haven't made it clear before: staying in Pensions when outside Seoul is the BEST method of accommodation. Even though you have to sleep on floor mats (unless you're the lucky couple who gets the one double-size bed) it's worth it to not have to deal with going in and out of hotel rooms, not having noise restrictions, and having 24hr access to a kitchen you can stock with all the junk food and booze your heart desires.

And you can play beerpong while wearing animal onesies without fear of public humiliation!
At least... until your friend posts a picture of said activity on their very public blog.

The next morning we made our way to the festival. It was mind-blowing just how many people were there and how many activities we could choose from, but it was nearing lunch time so we went right for the ice fishing. I think the best part of this festival was that there was a separate reception and fishing area for foreigners. This way they could keep an eye on you and see if you were completely oblivious as to how to catch, unhook, and kill your fish rather than looking pitiful for an hour or so until a Korean decided to be neighborly and help you figure shit out. Koreans were also allowed into the foreigner area if they were with a foreigner. 

The fishing was... cruel but effective. Rather than using bait thousands of people dangle four-hooked fishing lines into the water and snag the fish as they ignorantly swim by. Fish are stupid. You'd then need to bash it's brains in before it was able to flap its way into one of the other fishing holes. You're only allowed to catch three fish per person and we easily met our quota after about an hour of fishing. 

BEHOLD, THE MIGHTY HUNTER!

There was also a separate area for foreigners to turn in their fish for cooking. You could have them grilled or fried (for fried you were allowed to choose between dokkbokki sauce or soy sauce) and the price was 3,000W per fish (~$3). The fish don't taste really unique, but the 100% fresh quality of the meat was amazing!

Eating fish has never been more rewarding until you've bashed its brains in with a hunk of ice using your own two hands.

After lunch some people were ready to go home and others wanted to try out some of the ice activities. I busted my ass on the ice before going home for Christmas so I was more than a little apprehensive to play on the ice, but was more than willing to be goalie for a game of Ice Soccer (think Air Hockey, but with your feet and a lot more physical sacrifice).

HACK THE BONE! HACK THE BONE!

I'd recommend possibly getting to the festival in the morning, right after breakfast at a "we're not 20-somethings with little responsibility" time (aka before 10am). By the time we had fished, eaten, and played one game of Ice Soccer, the Winter Sun was beginning to set. Don't forget to take advantage of the 5,000W-off coupons you get when buying your tickets. You can use more than one at a time and buy items like makgeolli, honey, snacks, and various other Korean traditional products.

If you're looking for an awesome time outside of Seoul that's not terribly expensive (pension, transportation, food, and festival total was probably close to 150,000W, and that's a bit of an overestimation) I thoroughly recommend you check this festival out!

Survival Tip: Korean Winters

So, in case you didn't know, the winters in Korea are FREAKING COLD!!!

Visual Approximations:

Yes, you may have come from a place with a cold climate before, but there's little to prepare you for living in a city this cold where you will also rely heavily on public transportation or your own two feet. I was born in Vermont and raised in Maine and my childhood was spent in wonderfully warm cars  and rarely involved any walking in the winter longer than about 10 minutes. Any significant winters outdoors time was spent in such a fervor of activity that a white-wash was actually a welcome thing.

If when I say "white wash" you think of anything other than snow shoved in your face or down your pants you clearly didn't grow up in a cold climate.

Last week saw the breaking of a most unfortunate record; coldest day since 1956. The temperature dropped down to -21.7C (-7.1F). That's pretty DAMN cold! The winters have been getting colder every year and the summers have been getting hotter, so Korea's a pretty weird place to maintain a wardrobe.

Stolen from Wikipedia, because making tables is a job better left to people who don't hear the sound of a dental drill at the words "making tables.:

So, here are some handy-dandy tips to making the cold just a tiny bit more bearable.

Tip 1: Layers... LOTS of Layers!

The answer is, if you are living in Seoul in the winter... YES

Layering is the ultimate defense against cold weather. On the coldest days last week my office, in their infinite wisdom, decided not to turn all of the heating on. The building was roughly 5 degrees warmer than outside and my office was maybe 15 degrees warmer, it was terrible. I was wearing long underwear, stockings, leggings, a pair of thicker LLBean leggings, a wool skirt, long underwear shirt, a thick long-sleeve shirt, a thick sweater, and a scarf and I still wasn't warm enough in my office to get any work done. Layers are magic because you can easily adjust for whatever temperatures the day throws at you. Don't forget to layer your socks, though, because having cold feet is an easy way to ensure the rest of you feels cold as well.

The best clothing products for keeping warm in Korea I've found are the UNIQLO HeatTech line of long underwear. They feel really thin and flimsy but keep you a LOT warmer than you'd expect. They're also so thin that they easily slide under clothes without looking bulky, which was my major issue with my long underwear last year. Korean's also LOVE super long and thick scarfs and these babies do WONDERS! Just try not to leave yours in a Soju Tent one super drunken night last last December... not that I ever did that.

Tip 2: Surviving Korean "Heating" Techniques

Here's one of the roughest lessons you'll learn your first year in Korea: Koreans don't really like heating places and, when they do, they have weeeeiiirrrddd ways of going about it. If you work in a school the following completely fucked situations will most likely occur:

1) The heat will be on full-blast... but some of the windows will be open.

2) The classroom heaters will be on full-blast... but all the windows and outside doors in the hallways will be open.

3) Your students, while still wearing their enormous NorthFace jackets and scarves, will ask you to turn the heat down.

4) As soon as the temperature in your office becomes bearable the head teacher in the room will turn off the heat and open the windows

You see, Koreans have the... unexplainable phobia of "stale air." They think that not airing out a room once every few hours will kill you. Not make you sick, KILL YOU. They feel especially negatively towards heaters and fans. Air conditioners are OK, but fans, well, they have a concept called "Fan Death" where sleeping in a room with the doors and windows shut will literally kill you because eventually the room will only have CO2 in it... yeah. Heated air makes Koreans uncomfortable, dries out their skin, smells bad, is difficult to breathe BLAH BLAH BLAH. I mean, honestly... why do I even bother putting on a cute outfit in the winter?!

The best way to deal with this insanity is to be prepared. Daiso and other dollar stores around the city sell small fleece blankets that easily fit into a desk drawer... buy 5 of these. I keep slippers in my office now because my feet have a tendency to turn ice cold (slippers and slipper socks are also very easy items to buy in dollar stores, street vendors, and in HomePlus/GMart). Get used to the taste of crappy Korean mix coffee or invest in a FrenchPress for your desk, because it's the easiest and cheapest way to heat your innards. Recognize early that the mere fact that you are going inside does NOT mean you will be warmer. Korean coffee shops and restaurants have also not mastered the fine art of "making it warm enough to be comfortable."

Korean apartments are mostly heater by ondol heating, or floor heating. This stuff is magic once it' humming away. If your feet are warm your entire body feels much warmer. However, ondol takes a LONG time to heat the air, approximately an hour or two hours. The issue I've had with ondol, other than it being slow, is that it tends to super heat the air. It's difficult to find the temperature that will heat your apartment to and maintain a comfortable temperature.

EXPERT LEVEL TIP: If your ondol has a "외출" setting, USE IT! This circulates your heating to on/off every few hours. This is REALLY important if you go out of town during the winter. Some of my friends have had their pipes freeze while they were one and that is one of the least awesome of sauces.

Tip 3: Recognize Your Apartment's Weaknesses

The bad ju-ju carries over from the office to the apartment, sadly. Though my current apartment (in a new villa-style home with concrete walls and double-layered windows) has done an excellent job keeping in the heat, my apartment last year was TERRIBLE! I mean, the apartment was super awesome in every aspect that wasn't keeping it warm in the winter and cold in the summer. I had massive floor to ceiling windows along one wall. One window was the mandatory emergency exit that all apartments in Seoul have (though I don't see how a 4' squared pane of glass falling from 10 stories up is going to do to help anyone) and that window, my friends, let in a HUGE draft. Seriously, it felt like a light breeze. Some of my other friends live in older buildings which are poorly insulated because people in the past were idiots. Some of my friends in officetels are fine, but not all, so it's necessary to take precautions.

Draft-proof any seams with insulating foam. You can get it at any hardware store and I've seen it at dollar stores as well. This won't stop the draft, but it will certainly help. You can also put foil up on your windows, if you don't mind being kind ghetto about keeping the heat in. The two best weapons against the cold are either a heater blanket or a heating pad for you bed (available in HomePlus/GMart and on GMarket) . These things are MAGIC. I've been sleeping with only the same blanket I used in summer and have been perfectly comfortable, even too hot, with the heating pad.

Some of my friends have space heaters. I have one, but I've never used it. I'd recommend these, however, if you have a bigger apartment and want to heat only your bedroom. If my apartment were just a little bit bigger I'd probably use the space heater.

Tip 4: Surviving Korean Snow Clean-Up "Techniques"

By first recognizing that there really are none.

MUAHAHAHAHA

Seriously, I've never seen a snow plow, and we've had three pretty significant snowfalls this winter. Salting sidewalks is also something Koreans don't do. Only building owners or business people will sal the sidewalk and even then not all of them do it. Koreans also think that the best way to get rid of snow is by... sweeping it. No shovels... plastic brooms... whatever. As a result of this non-technique for making roads and sidewalks safer as soon as the Sun hits that snow and a few people walking on it compresses it all of Seoul turns into a fucking iceskating rink (sorry for using the f-bomb twice, but this topic infuriates me to no end). I fell three weeks ago and bruised my tailbone pretty badly. Don't wear cute shoes, wear the shoes with the most traction possible. Don't take normal steps, take baby steps, walk on the roughest patch of ground you can find. Be Safe!

Tip 5: Warm Havens

There are some ways that you can beat the cold. The best place is a jimjilbang. I'm not going to say any more about it here because there's a better place you can go to learn allll about it.

Another very good way is to get a gym membership. Yeah, you'll work up a sweat and also get hot and bothered looking at all the delicious Korean Man Candy.

Yes, please, thank you

But also gym showers are AMAZINGLY WARM and have awesome water pressure! I found a gym with western-style showers (some have communal ones... ew) and a lot of good looking guys, I love going to the gym. ^_^

Stay warm, folks!